The following is based on ACTUAL events....with only names, facts, dates, times and places changed to protect those involved.
1:55pm: Golf tournament arrival......directly after getting dressed in the woods.
*at this point in the day...things had NOT begun to get weird.
2:05pm: Tee off time......Tracy is a much better golfer than me.
2:56pm: - Tracy proves that she is NOT better than Phil Mickelson......although she is still much better than me.
-Jared takes the wheel.
2:58pm: -Jared isn't aloud to drive any more.
*note: it is at this point in the golfing journey of adventurous endevours that Dan notices something in the woods.
From eye witness interviews it has been established that after this photo the 'red furred wonder' dissappeared.
3:15pm: - It then reappeared in a golf bag screaming '9 wood'. This was the groups first account with the legendary 'Neil of the woods'.
3:18pm: -After establishing that 'Neil of the woods' was indeed not a 9 wood...our team bravely squared off with the beast in a no holds barred battle royale.......on the golf green.
The battle raged on for centuries last friday, and then without warning...
3:25pm: ....Dan drove in to save the day.
'Neil of the Woods' was defeated and everyone rejoiced. Although Jared was never seen again*....but as a consulation prize.....they picked up the monkey lad by hole 9.
*this can not be verified.